Equal Opportnity Saver
A demon hunting, helpless helping dsyfunctional family.
1. If you need to have a private conversation with the few people that you know and trust make sure you sweep for bugs.
2. If you believe you are being followed make sure you aren't even if you are late because it's better to be late than spied on.
3. Be aware that just because you all have been put in charge of the law firm that doesn't mean that there aren't people or whatever out to get you.
4. Make sure none of the employees are masking their evilness. Do a sweep for drugs that can mask them when singing for Lorne.
Angel: The Boss
Wesley Wyndham-Price: Research And Intelligence Department
Magickal Books: Each one ties into a discipline within the Wolfram & Hart archives
Winifred Burkle: Practical Science Department
Lorne: Entertainment Department
Charles Gunn: Lawyer and Demon Expert
His mind was enhanced with comprehensive knowlege of the law. The degrees are forged but he's the real deal. He has also been enchanced with demon knowlege. Being able to play golf is all part of the mojo the big boys installed.
Harmony Kendall: Angel's Secretary/Assistant
She must check with Angel before she does anything to make sure there aren't any more screwups.
We're gonna change things. We came to Wolfram & Hart because it's a powerful weapon and we'll figure out how to wield it. Sooner or later they'll tip their hand and we'll find out why they really brought us here. Meanwhile we do the work our way one thing at a time. We deal with whatever comes next.
Internment Acquisitions Division: Grave robbing and brings in much dinero. It has been shut down. Novack turned into buckets o lawyer when he tried to turn away their biggest client Magnus Hainsley who had a contract with the firm.
Voodoo Division: Make sure that you check employees for voodoo dolls that look like you.
Hourly sweeps are done by Mystics to ensure against spectral intrusion. But it can be blocked by certain experts in the black arts which pretty much makes them useless.
Non Human Resources: Mistress Riva
Pyschics are one of the advantages of the coporate teat.
To avoid vamps killing humans they are randomly tested and those test results go directly to Fred.
Operational Training And Research: A room equipped with automated training devices. You don't have to test a subject by just allowing her to pop you.
Hospital: All patients are in good hands or claws as the case may be.
The Senior Partners aren't very patient.
The Senior Partners don't take betrayal lightly. Gunn
Eve: Liason to the Senior Partners
We're a business and we have a bottom line. Now you can take your new client list and start hacking away from the top down. A lot of our clients are demons and almost all of them are evil. It's always more complicated than they seem champ. I mean you could shut the place down but then you wouldn't have it anymore. The place close down the connections dry up evil goes next door. This is the catch I'm explaining the catch so you don't have to stand around wondering what it is. See in order to keep this business running you have to keep this business running. And that means keeping your clients most of them anyway happy.
You're on the ins now. You can stop the worst of it maybe find some new solutions to some old problems. Come on isn't anyone excited? This is a crazy time of time. The most powerful evil around has given a pivotal position over to its sworn enemies.
You have reached Ritual Sacrifice. For goats press 1 or say goat.
To sacrifice a loved one or a pet press the pound key.
Special Opps Team
Headed up by Agent Howser who is now dead.
Not thrilled with secretary
She prefers to be called assistant
Threat of death
Fine with secretary
Able to see the sun
Through the special glass
Making it in the world
So many benefits
Types like a superhero
Not among the judgey
Keeps the same hours
As her boss
Plus she needs the dental plan
Creatures of the night unite
Even off the human blood
Feeling out of sorts
Unsure of his place
Just the one that punches
He was chosen
Gets all lawyered up
Full of the knowledge
Plus some crappy music
Good for elecution
Also full of demony knowledge
Kicked ass at his first trial
Sure there is no evil up there
Just a whole bunch of knowledge
That wasn't there before
It's still him underneath
Charles In Action
Thank you. Your honor the defense moves for a mistrial. Your honor that's the second prejudicial remarke you've made against the defense since I entered the room. You are your honor. I'm asking that you recuse yourself from this trial. No judge shall be appointed to try any case concerning a business colleague or employee. Permission to approach the bench. The higlighted portions indicate stock in Oriental Bay Exports which is owned by Lorison Incorporated which in turn is owned by a consortium that includes the defendant Corbin Fries. I found out and I've been on the case six hours.
McCracken vs the state of Maine 1954
Any financial dealings shall be deemed the responsiblitiy of the interested party regardless of number or function of employees unless said party has been judged mentally incapable.
Permission to approach. And furthermore the strain on my client's several businesses has forced Oriental Bay Exports to shrink its holdings of late if Mr Fries is convicted the interest your honor has in it would represent the controlling interest. I would prefer not to present the rest of our findings in front of the jury.
Agent Howser's Last Words
You really think you can solve the problem , come into Wolfram & Hart and make everything right. Turn night into glorious day, you pathetic little fairy. That's exactly what you are. You're miniscule, a dust mot on the shelf of that great institution. You think I'm just a trigger happy jerk who follows orders but I am something you will never be I'm pure. I believe in evil. You, your friends, you're conflicted, you're confused. We're not. That is why you are gonna lose. Because we possess the most powerful thing in the world conviction.
Internal Archives Classified Histories
There are over 3200 different reference. Four of them are about Angelus.
Dark Soul 182
The Reaper Matthias Mcvane
European aristocrat 18th century became a doctor. Nicknamed the Reaper for performing unnecessary surgery on his patients. The kind that you don't recover from. Word spread of his unorthodox practices. Fled to California still under Spanish rule at the time. His arrival coincided with a rash of brutal, ritualistic murders. Pieces of the victims placed in a manner suggesting an intimate knowledge of the dark arts. The slaughter continued for the better part of twenty years. The perpetrator was never caught at least not by the authorities. Wolfram & Hart took him out because they needed his blood. Representatives from Wolfram & Hart were looking to build a new branch in what would eventually become Los Angeles unfortunately a Spanish mission was already resting on the site the seers recommended. They needed an appropriate sacrifice to deconsecrate the grounds. So this place is built on the blood of a mass murdering psychopath. He was made solid and was put in permanent storage.
If there's anything Wolfram & Hart excells at it's keeping their unmentionables unmentioned. Eve
Historical Narrative Prophecies
It tells an epic appocalyptic battle where the vampire with the soul who plays a major part in that battle and there's a suggestion that the vampire will get to live again. The text isn't specific about the battle. Any vampire who has a soul who isn't a ghost.
1. When doing flyers for a party Wolfram & Hart wants to be up your alley sounds like a bus station pick up line unless of course that is what you were going for and that's the location of your party.
2. Don't bottle stuff up because you might end up punching the Halloween decorations. Inanimate objects that look evil are not necessarily going to be evil.
3. Don't neglect the few that you can trust. After all it's just you against all of the others at the firm. Stick together and hang out on occassion instead of being all work.
4. Have a drink once in a while and let your hair down because it helps to relieve the tension of working in an evil law firm.
5. Have someone keep track of your meetings to avoid those ackward naked moments.
6. Make sure you are the only one that has a key so people that are unwanted don't show up when you are needing some private time.
7. It's a really bad sign when your reflection starts talking to you.
8. If you are looking waxy eat a bagel.
9. If you kill a demon with blood that stings when it hits the skin take a nice long shower to get all squeaky clean.
10. Have the Transooning Furies pop by for a visit to cut down on the violence to avoid little snags like your friendly neighborhood empath demon going all crazy after having his sleep removed.
11. Don't allow people in that are wearing suits that are skinned from people or demons because that's just gross not to mention the potential smell factor.
12. A good host doesn't make judgements.
13. One person doesn't have to be the host of everything that's why you have your friends to back you up when you're out of sorts or going a bit crazy.
Lorne On Parties And Fun
Yeah you know Angel I don't have super human strength and I'm not a fighter. Quantam Physics makes me nauseous. I barely made a passing grade in Mystical Studies. But I'm on your team. This is something I can do. I believe it has a purpose that can help you even if you don't.
They are stored in the Psyche Component Storage Facility
Sleep Removed: In and out in 20 minutes with no scarring.
Inner Ear Removed: Madeline in Accounting had this procedure done.
The effects of long term sleeplessness on the subconscious mind of an empath can be catastrophic. Under normal conditions Lorne has the ability to read peoples destinies but now I think he's writing them. So what instead of receiving he's transmitting. And that's only phase one. If you sever the empath from his subconscious for too long that subconscious it can manifest. Big bad ugly twing and not in a good way.
We got to show all the big bads that the new regime is here to stay. For the most part it boils down to image and imagewise if the party doesn't kick ass we lose face.
Demon law requires blood signatures on all legal documents.
Just by signing and losing a little blood you accomplished:
Bankrupted a company that dumps raw demon waste into Santa Monica Bay.
Banished a clan of pyro warlocks into a Hell dimension.
Started a foster care program for kids whose parents have been killed by vampires.
We've done more good here in a month than Angel Investigations did in a year. Charles
1. Don't go through middle men since they are usually clueless.
2. No cash no product.
3. Ask to meet the big wig.
4. Don't hog the guns.
5. Make sure everyone has a weapon before you go all 007.
6. Practive using a gun so you hit your target.
7. When hiding hit the floor so you don't get hooked.
8. Tell the boss who you plan to take with you since it's only polite to clear it with him first.
9. Some protective gear wouldn't be a bad idea like a bullet proof vest perhaps.
10. Remember that some memories are yours alone so don't be so hard on the guy since he doesn't remember what he did and after all he did do it for the right reasons.
11. Don't mention having sex with a robot since it's just not the best thing in the world to reveal since your secret will be out.
12. Some people are just not comfortable with the whole hugging thing.
13. Trace radiation can mean a bomb or self destructive device.
14. If you're a spook you don't have to leave the building if there's a bomb scare.
15. Sometimes truth is stranger than fiction.
16. Sometimes the lights just goout. It doesn't mean that you're being pulled into Hell again.
17. Attack priority only goes when fencing.
18. A sign that something is wrong is if your father who doesn't miss an opportunity to put you down actually asks your opinion.
19. Spike is able to punch someone if he concentrates hard enough to make contact.
20. Losing your free will makes you nauseous but it's temporary once your will have been restored.
21. Mentioning the whole killing thing upon becoming a vampire isn't a good idea although the intent was to help in this case it just doesn't work although it was a sweet thought.
1. A nooner is needed especially if a bloke has been incorporeal for quite some time and it's with his ditzy ex.
2. If someone starts bleeding tears clock them in the coconut before they do it to you or worse.
3. A Code Black means that the building is being sealed off so no one comes in or leaves.
4. A howling abyss is a horrible sound and should be avoided at all costs.
5. Don't finger the robots because you don't know what may happen as a result.
A translation of a prophecy is like comparing the King James Bible with the original Aremaic or Hebrew.
Most of the flavor and subtlety of usage, historical context has been stripped away.
Bogus Shanshu Prophecy
The root of the tree will split in two and each then will seek nourishment from the buried river. Storm unleased the balance will falter until the vampire with a soul drinks from the cup of Perpetual Torment. He will have the weight of worlds upon him binding his limbs, grinding his bones to meal until he saves creation or destroys it. The vampire will have his past washed clean and live again in mortal form. There is not wrong the drinking of the cup is predestined. That can't be changed. Whoever drinks from it was meant to. And when one is confirmed as the central figure of the prophecy the universe should realign itself. Housed in the hidden city of Petra. Disappears during the Crusades. Surfaces again in the Vatican. Vanishes in the third year of the Inquisition. It's in Nevada. Death Valley to be exact. The earth will flash and mark the appearnace of the cup at the columns and the desert will will swallow cup and house whole. And the fat lady will sing them all.
New And Improved Wolfram & Hart
Welcome to the LA branch of Wolfram & Hart the oldest and most powerful law firm in the city. Founded in 1771 deconsecrated by the blood of mass murderer Mafias McVane Wolfram & Hart has put roots down in this glamourous city that grow deep and branches that reach right into the heart of every major coporation including Yo Yo Dine, Weiland Yotani, and News Court. That captain of industy we own his soul. That fabulous movie queen she owes us her first born. But times change and Wolfram & Hart is changing right alone with them. Under our new CEO Angel we're focusing less on power and more on using their power for good. We have a zero tolerance policy for killing and that includes you vampires. That better be pig's blood mister. Yes our esteemed president has made it clear. This is a new company for the new millineum and he wants to work with you. If you don't kill we won't kill you. That's right no more employee sacrifices. At Wolfram & Hart you're part of the family now. You can work your way up the ladder and there'll always be a hand to help you up it. Every life and unlife is as important to our new management as their own. So go ahead relax and enjoy your new Wolfram & Hart family because at our firm everyone matters. You matter. Buddy you're going places.
This is war two demon clans the Vinjis and the Sarbens they've been battling it out for five generations. Way back when clans got along ok shared a few hundred miles of desert, traded livestock, and even partied together once in a while. Then a Vinji used the wrong fork at at Sarben bonding ceremony. The Sarbens took offense and they've been slaughtering each other ever since. They're pretty finicky about manners. But the clients have agreed to negotiate a truce here tomorrow. Demon Rights Activist by the name of Tobias Dupree got involved. He's the liason to both clans only guy in the world they all trust and he called us for help. (An Aside) The Vinjis and the Sarbens are notoriously viscious. Why not let them wipe each other out? Hey I got no love for these guys but we manage to push through a peace the whole demon world's gonna know we got game. Obviously both clans are sensitive to the smallest slight. We don't dot an i or cross a t this whole thing can explode in our faces.
Employees who are evil beware!
Eli in Accounting was beheaded due to to fact that he was dismembering virgins for his own amusment.
To avoid a nasty stain when terminating an employee lay down some plastic.
Nobody in this office gets away with murder not anymore.
The hardest part of the job is terminating an employee to save corporate America from evil.
Fred's Finds On Tobias Dupree
Significant postmortem battering. Suggests prior relationship with the victim. Consulting coroner puts time of death at approximately 1:30 a.m. which... Bite marks are 17 milimeters deep on the right side of the neck. The size and depth of the wound indicate a female vampire.
Premptive strike before he and his followers go underground. Wes
Evil Warlock: The longer we wait the more powerful he becomes.
There are at least two initiates in his inner circle who would jump at the chance to overthrow him.
An evil warlock and a cult leader. He's got over a thousand followers. We're pretty sure they sold most of their children down the Hades River in return for some serious demonic moo. One more religious fringe group stockpiling weapons but in this case the weapons are black magicks of the most dangerous variety. Not so much stopping as redirecting their energies. See a cult this big has alliances, connections if we can confront them directly it can be very bad for business. But if we eliminate their leader covertly. Then the spend the next billing cycle fighting among themselves to hack out the new pecking order.
Weapons In Space
There is an orbital microwave cannon up there focused to the sattelites communication signals into a pinpoint beam. It can raise the temperature of the targeted area a thousand degrees in less than five seconds.
Yes I know but he wouldn't have pled no lo contendre if he knew about the exulpatory evidence being withheld by the prosecutor. Look, look set up a meeting with Judge Berton closed chambers. Well screw the D.A he's the one trying to pull a fast one. Let him read about it in the paper.
Half the cases that cross our desk are settled out on the links before they ever make it to a trial.
Nine holes instead of a jury of your peers. Just what the founding fathers had in mind. Fred
Well sometimes you got to work the system before it works you. Charles
Charles On The Move
Look I know our move to Wolfram & Hart hasn't been all flowers and candy. But we've been able to do some serious good while we're here. Lives saved, disasters averted. With all our fingers and souls still attached. End of the day I'm thinking we made the right choice.
Options Regarding Eve
1. Firing which is a generous one.
2. Keep her and limit her access.
It's not about what I believe it's about the evidence. Charles
Charles On Eve
She's a liason to the Senior Partners. You don't get to be that without serious juice. Move against her without solid proof and it can end in a long bloody fight.
Plans For Eve
1. Restrict her access.
2. Keep a closer eye on her.
3. See what she's up to.
4. Play her like she's been playing us.
He's been here. Picking up loads of trace signatures. Hair follicles, enzymes, and something blood but it's not his, it's...
Greenley: A client that was up on a racketeering charge.
He's a Wolfram & Hart client. Our client. And he's evil. What are the odds? Angel
Wes With The Knowledge
Five holy women. This wasn't random. It's ritual. These jump dimensions. Also not shockingly our client practices black arts. He's escaped through a pan-dimensional doorway. Disappeared into any one of infinite universes.
Helpful Tips To Avoid Clients That Butcher And Bail
1. Have your equipment calibrated to track stuff in and out of this dimension although it may take months it could come in handy to avoid more innocent people from getting butchered so they can escape and you won't be out another ten million.
2. See about keeping the client confined in some way to avoid them leaving until the trial and don't be fooled if it's a somewhat minor crime compared to others since they may get desperate and butcher five nuns.
3. It sucks big time but sometimes the bad will wreak his havoc and you won't be able to stop it but do the best you can since that's all you really can do.
4. Remember how worse things would be if you weren't running the show and what kinds of horrors would be done if good people weren't there to do what good they can.
5. At times you may want to quit but you can't since doing good is your destiny and you can't save everyone and besides there has to be a balance between good and evil since one can't exist without the other.
That's it. I can't do this anymore. Any of this. Living with it. Running Wolfram & Hart. I quit.
I'm resigning. Set back Wes? Status quo. Evil wins. And instead of just wiping it out we negotiate. Or worse for it. Not that you aren't doing your jobs. It's that we shouldn't be doing thes jobs in the first place or I shouldn't.
Let's say we've all had a bellyful. Any thought about what'll happen to us if we try to bye-bye. The ramifications I mean. You think the Senior Partners are just gonna let us breeze on out the front door. I'ms aying we knew what we were getting into when we signed up for this gig. Let's not start pretending that this was some lease with an option to buy. Ok maybe I don't. It's 'cause I believe in what we're doing. We all got something out of this.
Protection runes derived from the Enochian alphabet. Symbols some kind of concealment spell. Clouds before the all seeing eyes. They protect the bearer from being viewed remotely from higher powers, seers, mystics. Or, transposed to the day, any means of modern survelliance. They allow you to walk around without being seen by video cameras and security systems don't even know anyone is there which is seriously bad.
It's a fail safe. They built a fail safe. Look the Senior Partners were never certain they could keep you under their thumb, so they created a fail safe. Housed it in the sub-levels of the building. I don't know what it is exactly but it's huge and specifically designed to destroy you. The only way to shut it down is in the chamber itself.
Setting Alarms Off
If you set off the alarms you end up with loud noise, red lights, and zombies looking to party.
The blue button shocks you so avoid pushing it unless you care for a jolt.
Tactical swept her hangouts, and our locators ran through their usual voodoo. Each came back with the same result: Eve has vanished.
She did leave swearing vengeance. That usually doesn't go well for us. Wes
Rigt about now Lindsey should be boiling in his own filth.
Oh, calling the patient before midnight on a Friday? Careful, gang. We might get to have social lives. Lorne
Wes' Big Plans
Speak for yourself. I've got five or six hours of spell detailing to do.
Gunn's Big Plans
I got a mess of briefings to go through.
Fred's Big Plans
I have to redo the Trask Experiment. Knox really dropped the ball on that one. So much for social lives.
Well, should we at least meet back here in a few hours and talk aboud some work some more? Angel
Lorne On Sky Bar
Well, I'm out of here. If we're working there's a client part down at Sky Bar with my name all over it. You been to Sky Bar lately? It's all frat boys and television executives.
We have enough work for tonight. Let's not worry about yesterday. Wes
Note: Improve security pronto to avoid more unwanted guests.
This place might as well be a bus station. Angel
Fred Has A Case
Mini Epidemic: Eleven children between the ages of five and eight hospitilized due to collapse over the last three weeks. None of them have woken up.
It's a good idea to find out if there is some kind of link between them like them all collapsing around the same time during a certain TV show.
Listen about the epidemic, might not be mystical. Knox found a systematick endocrine dsyfunction common with all the children similar to the effects of an obscure rain forest pathogen. So I put in a call to the C.D.C., and...
I'm working under the assumpion that this thing's mystical in nature. Fred
Children's Epidemic: Seven kids, comatose each with a semi-rictus of the facial muscles. I haven't been able to isolate a causative agent. Well I've been down the strictly physiological route, number crunched all the victims charts, even had our hospital contacts send over blood samples. I've pulled all their plasma apart. No indicators on the cellural or subcellular level.
Your wish, dream boat my command. I know most of the show runners in town and none of them are really up to this sort of big league sinister...Lorne
Angel's Little Problem
I do not have puppet cancer! Come on guys this is a serious situation. I'm a puppet, and there are childrens lives at...Hey it's Smile Time!
This transformation may have altered your stress response mechanism. Wes
Translation: He's saying that you have the proportiante excitibility of a puppet your size.
Smile Time Creator
Gregor Framkin: Yeah real rags to riches. Started out in a garage with a couple of used couches and a glue gun. He turned it into a puppet gold mine.
Angel Means Business
Wes put the special ops team on Red Alert. I want helicopters and tear gas. This is war.
Bit by bit he notices
Losing the knowledge
Upgrade going all wonky
Not wanting to lose it
Back to the doc he goes
Finally has meaning in his life
Doesn't want to lose it
Ends up making a deal
To make things permanent
But it comes with a price
That he's willing to pay
Gunn And Lorne Confronting Framkin
We're onto you. Understand? We're gonna shut you down. Well for starters violations of the provisions of section 5 5 6 8 C set forth in chapter 15 of the Children's TV Thing! You turned my boss into a frickin' puppet! Gunn
Think on your feet when the knowledge escapes you.
Yeah well a fight suits us just fine, Papa Smurf. We're gonna let the entire world know what you're up to.
It's a hidden carrier masked by a spell that turns the TV into a two way conduit with direct access to the viewer. Fred
That's how he's been draining energy from the children, and judging from the strength of yesterday's signal... Wes
Framkin's ready to take out the whole audience. Fred
The object that you described in that secret room is most likely a repositoryy for the childrens life forces. We'll have to break the binding magick on it. Wes
Which should free those children and reverse your puppet problem.
Not him. Them. Framkin's not doing this. It's the puppets. They're demons. The show is possessed. Smile Time's ratings hit an all time low last year. Framkin made a deal with some devils to bring it back to number one. Dead sure. Every contract signed with the lower planes is filed in the Library of Demonic Congress. You just gotta know where to look. Pretty trick legalease, too. Framkin must have missed some of the fien print. Which allowed them to take over everything. Including Framkin. These particular devils have a very distinctive M.O. You seen the last few seasons of Happy Days? Point is you wanna take out Smile Time, take out the puppets.
You can hide from the Senior Partners but not from the DWP and not from our many, many ears. Gunn
Wolfram & Hart has offices in every major city in the world.
Be careful when going in the white room since you may end up getting knocked around by yourself.
The physical form of the conduit is determined by the viewer.
You can't reason with the conduit.
It gets seriously pissed off when you don't do what it wants.
I am not your friend. I am not your flunky. I am your conduit to the Senior Partners and they are tired of your insolence oh, yeah, they are not here for your convenience. Deals are for the devils.
Wolfram & Hart Records
There's nothing that's not in our records, except what come before the Old Ones.
Wolfram & Hart jets can travel to England in four hours.
Charles Means Business
You're not hearing me. I know you got healers working for you. I don't care if the Old Ones scare them. I don't care if the Old Ones kill them. Get their asses down her or you're gonna be in a world of hurt. No I am not talking about a lawsuit. I'm talking about bones that go crunch.
Not A Teleporter: No characteristic displacement of the atmosphere around here.
The Gem: Time. The markings refer to a series of consively timed intervals. This gem is a focal point to the sarcophagus. It might be useful if it isn't already drained. The one holding the gem can stop Illyria from doing the time warping thing.
Gunn's Big Regrets
Then take it back. Everything you put in my head the law, all the knowledge take it back. Take more leave me a vegetable. I don't care just bring her back. Please bring her back.
There's nothing to bring back. Miss Burkle's soul was consumed by the fires of resurrection. Everything she was is gone forever.
Not Just A Piece Of Paper
It was just a paper. I was losing it everything they put in my head. Everything that made me different, special. And he could fix it make it permanent so I signed a piece of paper. It was a customs release form. I didnt' think anyone would get hurt. I couldn't go back to being just the muslce. I didn't think it would be one of us. I didn't think it would be Fred.
The Gateway: Wolfram & Hart threw a lock over the gateway. They're big on things happening on their time table.
Wolfram & Hart in Illyria's time they were weak barely above the vampire. My how time has changed that.
Nothing from Wolfram & Hart is free. Wes
Proviso on Contract: The CEO of a Wolfram & Hart branch can invoke Rapio Salvas order basically says you're taking custody of an employee. It's not usually used for protection but it should work.
There are layers upon layers at Wolfram & Hart Angel things you'll never understand. What am I? I'm a child of the Senior Partners created to do their bidding. To watch tell them what I see, pass on messages to you if there are any. Eve
Wolfram & Hart Holding Dimension
There version of a penalty box that they put people they are unsure to do with. Take the Camaor which will drive you there. You have to find the wrath to get out.
This isn't Hell it's the burbs close enough. Spike
It consists of the same thing happening over and over again. You have a wife and kid. You go outside to pick up your paper and wave at the neighbors, before walking inside you pick up your son's paper, inside you do homework with your son and then your wife asks for you to get a lightbulb which of course wigs you out, each day your heart is ripped out by an ugly ass S & M demon so you have quite the collection piling up on the floor. You wear a necklace so you have no idea what's going on. If you go in for someone you have to leave someone behind and when that person starts to forget the door will close.
A well dressed man
With a menacing presence
Comes in with not a word
Running for her life
Shoves his fist through a chest
Finally speaks up
Looking for her to sign
Terminating her employment
Along with all the benefits
New and creepy liasion
Marcus Clears The Air
Let's be clear on this things run differently now. I'm no little girl. You and I won't be making love on this couch any time soon. Now with that in mind how can I help you?
Yes you did. They took your son, your raging psychopathic son gave him a new family, changed his memories, changed everyones memories actually in order to give him a new life, a normal life. We couldn't be happier. The Senior Partners honor their deals and believe me they have no desire to upset such a profitable partnership.
Wes Observes Illyria
She's either counting oxygen molecules or analyzing the petrie dish she just put into her mouth or sleeping I can never quite tell.
What To Do Regarding Illyria
1. Test her powers
2. Study her
3. Figure out what she is
Spike's Data On Illyria
Glad you asked so far I've established that she can hit like a Mack Truck, selectively alter the flow of time, and uh possibly taunt the plants.
Cybers Vale: One of the go to warlocks when it comes to the magickal mojo, specializes in memory restructuring, mind control, temporal shifts.
When Connor was five he got lost in a department store. He wandered off while his family was shopping. It scared the poor child nearly half to death. Yes but he remembers it happening. He remembers screaming in the middle of the store. He remembers his mother rushing towards him. And he remembers his father sweeping him up into his arms. I did. He is some of my best work.
Olan Window: It's a fascination little spell. It allows you to see the past as it once was. You have to be careful with it though. If it were to brak around someone whose mind had been altered then all his old memories would come rushing back.
Wes On Illyria's Progress
Illyria: She has the power of a God. She has the ego of a God. She was ruler of the world after all this sort of thing goes to one's head.
I am making progress there's distance of course she'd never accept any of us as peers but I afford her some amusement here. I wouldn't presume to know what she wants but I understand the resource the power she represents. If we could just find some way to integrate her to convince her to...
Spike Knows The Diff
You ain't her. I can see it. Lord knows I can smell it and I got noo problem hitting it.
That time stop thing's a royal bitch but I'm starting to cess out her million y ear old moves cheeky mix a little Tae Kwan Doe, little Brazilian na jitz zu ancestorally speaking.
The thousand year war of good vs evil is well under way. Evil just hasn't told anyone about it yet which is probably why they're winning. Oh by the way we're apparently on the wrong side or the right side if you like winning.
Gunn On A Delicate Matter
It's not garbage it's a body and there's a bloody gang war coming our way if we don't get it back. It's the remains of the Cappo de familia of the Goran Demon Clan. That's 'cause the Cappop was human tolerant kept a low profile more interested in profit than mayhem. Died on a business trip in Italy. We need to go there retrieve his body, and return it to his family in the next ooh twenty-six hours.
Or what he gets deader? Spike
No he stays dead. They die. They pupate. They live again. But only if the proper rituals are performed by the immediate family. If the Cappo's body isn't returned in time the rituals won't take so long Cappo hello power vacuum. Rival Clans they aren't as tolerant of humans. If we do this it all stays cool.
The foulest evil Hell has a property for. The vilest wretch this side of Mt Everset which he's climbed several times. When you're dealing with him you get a satisfactory outcome. He doesn't do spells. He considers them dirty dirty tricks for dirty people. He is a stallion in the sack and can easily get girls to agree to a threesome for instance Dru and Darla although they turned down Angelus and William. Also he wrote a book that's supposed to be quite a life changer.
Wes's Report On Illyria
Her powers have been greatly reduced. She still has an unusual level of strength but is no longer invulnerable or able to alter time. She's overcompensating, posturing. Her powers are weakened but she's still unpredictible. Perhaps more so until she learns how to adjust. We have to be careful not to agitate her.