No one likes a double crosser.
When you don't know what it is that you're eating it just doesn't appeal especially
if it's gloppy.
Don't mock your centaur teacher.
Check Athens for a cook.
The girl isn't a cook she's a cadet.
Girls are supposed to be sweet and gentle. Iolaus
No one likes a sexist pig.
Working for your passage seriously sucks since swabbing the deck is no fun.
Don't let go of the rope.
The forbidden just makes it that much more attractive.
To get the key you may have to cuddle and not in a good way.
Some guys are just more curious than others.
Swinging on a rope is a good idea but be warned that it could break.
People should not be cargo. Hercules
Don't hit on an Amazon unless you want to be in for a world of hurt.
Just because you heard something about someone doesn't make it true.
Go to the source to find out the truth.
It's handy to have someone sneaky, underhanded and conniving.
If the wood breaks in two use both hands for maximum beating potential.
Use a bucket to stop the arrow.
They're Amazons Iolaus they don't look men up they conquer them. Jason
Always keep your options open.
Amazons just aren't the cooking type so don't even bother ask.
Someone that likes the quiet shouldn't be planning any parties.
Mind the hair. Iolaus
Respect and responsibility are the keys to an orderly society.
The Dean of Mean will make you work all day if you knock him down.
To give the illusion of Iolaus have some boots and rig a bale of hay to be pulled
down.
If Meanie trys to go up to the loft squirt him in the eye with cow's milk but make
sure it looks like an accident.
If your teacher comes in while you're working disguise yourself if you're forced
to wait on him.
Slop the hogs so Meanie can't tell who it is especially if you can't come up with
anything else when you're under pressure.
Grab a mob to use as hair and dive into the mud so you can't tell who it is.
Is there no trust anymore? Jason
Disguise Tips
1. Hold a bunch of dishes in front of you.
2. Slouch and hold your noise when you talk to make your voice sound different.
3. Grab a goofy hat and say that it's a cute gimmick where all the waiters wear
goofy hats.
4. Walk with the tray backwards to give him his food.
5. Use the tray to hide your face.
6. Duck before you're seen after the owner of the hat grabs it off your head.
7. Who are you fooling anyway? But totally appreciate the tip your teacher ends
up giving you.
You can't blame yourself for your son's mistakes.
Sometimes it's a teacher that learns a lesson. Cheiron
If the door is chained that's a pretty good sign the place is closed.
Gods as a rule tend not to worry about mortals being inconvenienced.
No one wants to be tasting large tongue all night.
Watch where you're walking.
Big guy with hooves go first got it. Iolaus
Yeah parsley it's this little green garnish it makes it look festive. Jason
You shouldn't punish someone for something they didn't know about.
It sucks being on the bottom.
Don't you break that bread. Hercules
You can also trip on an orange just like you can with a bannana.
Haven't you heard of hoof and mouth diseases? Hercules
Your friends should know when your birthday is even if you are the future King.
Fighting over a table is really lame.
Good Fighting Causes
1. Fighting over a kingdom.
2. Fighting for a noble cause.
3. Fighting to stop outlaws.
Well if you and this table seem to be so in love my friends and I won't keep you
love birds apart any longer so do you want to be alone? Hercules
I said we wouldn't fight over a table. I never said we wouldn't fight to defend
ourselves. Hercules
Dakuda: It's an award for the student demonstrating the highest ideals of the
Academy.
Ideals: Honor, Skill, Loyalty
1st Test Of Skill: One to one combat
You must be ready for anything. You must learn to see with other senses. Cheiron
If your blade breaks it's time to yield.
Hephaestus's Secret
His own special alloy is three times as strong and twice as light as Phoniceian
iron. Trade secret magnetic metal. It's also great for fighting dragons.
I trust that you don't think that being a Dakuda is about shiny weapons. A Dakuda
must learn to trust his or her other sense. Cheiron
2nd Test: Fighting blindfolded
A Dakuda must be adept at one to one combat under any circumstances. Cheiron
A sword is not a toy.
I mean the last thing this world needs is for them to fall into the hands of some
big, ugly, creepy, funny looking kind of...Iolaus
Just because someone doesn't want to fight doesn't meant that person doesn't need
the weapons.
Never trust a bully.
Well I know how it feels not to be liked. Hephaestus
Ugly bullies can run in families.
Never let a simple case of jealousy wreck a friendship.
Just because a girl's blind doesn't mean that she can't dole out an ass whuppin'.
Sometimes you have no choice but to fight.
A warrior's strength comes from within.
Just one thing if someone wants that fancy belt of your's just give it to them.
Lilith
Hey birthday boy treats. Iolaus
Storytime With Jason And Iolaus
They thought everything was quiet and then it came again that eerie scratching sound.
So the maid and the maidens sped off in the chariot. When they got home they found a monster stuck in the side of the chariot.
I got a story for you. It takes place in a forest not unlike this in fact it could
be in this very path. There were two no there were three young warriors coming from Troy and they heart this noise. Kinda
like that. No it was harpies half woman half bird beast swooped down and tore the flesh from your bones. Yeah yeah laugh all
you want I swear it's true. They went down that path.
No tresspassing means no tresspassing.
I don't break laws just 'cause it's convenient. Jason
A short cut isn't always a good idea.
Don't be afraid to ask for help.
Centaurs aren't lowly beasts.
The ancient fued between centuar and Amazon is best left in the past. Cheiron
Never touch an Amazon's stuff.
For a little play fill a pig's bladder with water to use as a ball.
If the ball is too high use your head.
It's hard to talk to someone when you keep getting interrupted.
An Amazon reply that means she so isn't interested: What's your sign? No tresspassing.
You can't actually own a person.
As guests the Amazons are under the protection of the Acadey.
You can't just ignore the law even when it's wrong.
Tradition Of Champion
Combat by champions is a test of skill on the ropes. First one to knock the opponent
to the ground wins.
The rules of Champions I win I get a reward. Hercules
Check the scroll since rules are rules after all.
Great Kings learn from their losses.
Every beginning starts with another beginnings end. Cheiron
Blind Date Tips
1. If there are three girls there should be three guys it's all about balance.
2. When you're introduced to your date it's a good idea to actually sit down next
to her.
3. Lose the fourth guy since it kinda spoils the mood but do it in a way that won't
hurt his feelings.
4. Offer to find the fourth guy a date.
5. Don't leave the girls waiting too long or they just might leave which is a downer
in the realm of dating.
Getting A Girl's Attention Tips
1. Say, "Hello" and say it in the right way so try practicing before you try it
out on a girl.
2. Tell the girl she has pretty eyes even if she doesn't.
3. Don't turn away since the girl might walk away and a guy may be there instead.
4. If you do turn away to get support from your friends make sure the girl is still
sitting there to avoid complimenting a guy.
5. If you end up complimenting a guy say, "Sorry you're not his type but you do
have pretty eyes."
You can't make a girl like you.
Hephaestus making a woman sounds like an incredibly bad idea. Hercules
There are just some things you shouldn't do.
Making A Girl Checklist
1. She has to be smart.
2. She has to know herself.
3. She has to have a very strong will (like bronze).
4. Her senses are amazing.
5. She can see and hear things men can't.
6. Her heart is pure (like gold).
8. She is is caring, generous, and full of love and affection.
Blow the magic dust to wake up your girl which will take a minute.
What girl doesn't like butterflies and flowers.
Don't bring your brother and friends on a date since it's such a bad idea.
Sometimes your words can come back to haunt you.
Don't mess with a pissed off God even if most of the time he's a nice guy.
Don't turn the girl you made into one with a heart like Olympian ice even if she
didn't turn out the way you want since lives can be put in danger of the serious kind.
Sometimes you need to try another approach.
Say good morning when Fuducias says it first.
Kindred is centaur for clan.
Pay attention in language class.
Knocking stuff down really sends a sign of authority.
Cut out on a Friday since it's the last day of the week and you won't miss anything
and hey everyone loves a long weekend.
When you have four feet you can run twice as fast.
Two guys don't add up to a centaur.
If you encounter Amazons give the sign for peace. The hands raised above the head.
Things can change a lot in a fairly short time.
Leaders don't need to be cruel to be in change. The best ones can also be merciful.
Say yes when you get an Amazon invite.
So you're an Amazon what's up with that isn't a good question to ask.
Just because a girl is an Amazon doesn't mean she can't like a guy.
Hold your horses is a bad choice of words when everyone is going nuts over a supposed
centaur attack.
Centaurs don't do sneak attacks.
Being associated with a centaur doesn't make you a spy.
Find out who the enemy really is before declaring war.
Sometimes it's best to shut your big mouth.
Guys aren't all the same since there are some good ones out there.
You give up on half the world you prove them right girls can't make it. Hercules
Walking off in a hugg can get you into some serious trouble fo the spikey variety.
A good grip is needed unless you want to become kabobbed.
Just so you know Quido is on the Centaur Council.
Soland is the head guy when it comes to the centaurs.
Three Options To Consider
1. Deluded
2. Lying
3. Being deceived
Going to war over land is pretty dumb.
We should maintain peace.
Don't let your anger cloud your thinking.
Giving advice is well and good but one should also heed it.
Some people are too blind to listen.
Things aren't always as they appear.
I just don't want people I care about to die. Hercules
What's wrong with this picture is that no one's looking at the whole picture.
Scorch marks indicate a setup.
It is important to find another way if possible.
You know if you want to trick someone you make them so angry they can't think straight and sure they's do
anything you want. Iolaus
Work on your stalling tactics since it could really come in handy.
A key just hanging there is too simple so be prepared for a trap that could spell your doom.
Attack the archer not the arrow. Cheiron
I k now a con when I see it and this has setup chisled all over it. Iolaus
In the trees the Amazons clearly have the advantage.
A sword doesn't solve every problem since it's never that easy.
Some thigns aren't worth asking about.
Having the heart of an Amazon is high praise indeed.
When you don't have much time use it wisely.
You need to work on your timing.
Sometimes emotions cloud reason and even a teacher forgets lessons he's taught for so long. You reminded me
of them and I thank you. Cheiron
Being different isn't always bad it can be your burden or your strength. It's up to you to decide which.
A guy will never pass the physical to become an Amazon.
Sure nice people take turns but they are also not rude.
If a guy is rude tie the rope to something and for the Gods sakes don't hold in in your hand unless you want
to be dragged by the chariot.
You know if you'd tied the rope to a tree like I told you this wouldn't have happened. Iolaus
Fun is an approach to life that everyone should try.
Well we can't all be exciting. Hephaestus.
Hephaestus On People
Well some people have a fire inside them. They take everything that life has to offer devour like flame burns
wood.
Don't forget to keep pumping while you're talking.
Hephaestus On When He Tried To Change
Well I tried to change once. This fire here comes straight from the heart of the earth. It can melt you inside
make you new. Well I asked it to come into my heart and make me a warrior like Hera wanted me to be. Yeah I just asked it.
Yeah didn't like it much couldn't get any work done. There's always work to do.
Sometimes change isn't a good thing.
You know I'm gonna be King someday. Well I'm just waiting for the right kingdom to come along. Iolaus
If you're pretending to be a Prince make sure you have a kingdom in mind to make your fib seem more realistic.
If he makes it I'll eat my hat. I'm not gonna eat my hat. Iolaus
Some guys like sassy girls.
Fun is good and all but a person needs to sleep sometime.
Oats are a centaur thing.
When doing a drill you're supposed to go at half speed.
Don't touch the guy who's all read and on fire 'cause you'll get burned.
A rope is useless against fire and for the Gods sakes let go before you get burned.
Wood catches on fire too as cloth does.
Chain won't burn but you may end up hanging upside down and nearly set aflame.
Help get your friend down who's hanging.
You can't be what you're not so be happy with who you are.
Everyone needs a day off sometime.
There's more to being a warrior than just training you gotta develop your character.
Mushroom picking doesn't build character it's just an excuse to get you out so the
others can plan your surprise party although you never know it could work.
A girl has to stay on top of things when she's among a bunch of boys.
You can't have a surprise party without some major decorations. Jason
Training hard deserves a reward.
Input is required by the farm boy as well as the Prince.
Now only get the mushrooms that are non posionous and don't eat any until Cheiron's
checked them out. Hercules
How can something that tastes so good come from such a disgusting plant? Lilith
The bigger mushrooms are always down in back.
Giant rockso n the leg hurts like Tartarus.
Tell the truth when someone's hurt.
A cave in with a bunch of rocks falling on ya could lead to your head hurting
big time.
Where's aspirin when you need it?
When decorating for a surprise party you want to go for a different look otherwise what would be the point.
It's good to get in touch with your feminine side but don't go too overboard 'cause it could get scary.
Sometimes no matter what you do the person dies anyway.
Someone that can sense trouble makes a good lookout.
Not every girl wants to be a homemaker since some girls need something different like being a warrior.
Being small can be an advantage like catching your opponent off guard for instance but eventually you need
to learn to fight.
Party Planning
Don't forget extra cream pies when planning a party.
Don't forget the Borkabobs because everyone loves 'em.
Just because someone is a girl doesn't mean she's all that crazy about pink but it was sweet to try.
Even if you don't want to sometimes you have to leave to get help.
Don't trust strange men that pop up in a cave out of nowhere.
Sometimes you just need to walk away while the guys argue.
Leave when things get too hairy like a fight breaks out.
Check to make sure the guy's dead before you start celebrating.
Ares you know it wouldn't have taken a brain surgeon to figure out my brother was behind all this. Hercules
Picking mushrooms can get pretty hairy especially when there's a God around.
Party preparations can really take their toll so a nice nap is in order afterwards.
The question can't be answered false when it's
not a true/false question.
In order to graduate you actually need to crack a book once in a while.
Smacking a God with a paddle only damages the paddle.
Blood isn't always thicker than water.
If a God's trying to kill you that's a serious sign that he doesn't like you not
one little bit.
If you can't swim you should really learn so you're not stuck on shore unable
to help your friend.
It's a good sign when your question about being dead is answered with a no.
Iolaus On The Gods
Cowards! Come on and fight me! You call yourself Gods! You sneak up and attack peole
without warning! You're not Gods! You're just a bunch of stinking cowards!
You know it's said that uh a friend's never really lost if you remain true to the
dreams you shared.
Go on and hug him after all he's your best friend and he's not dead.
Sometimes the fish is inside the boot so make sure you check before chucking it.
It's a good idea to run away from the flames since no one likes to burn.
You pull a guy out of the pond and he doesn't remember who he is he's gotta be called
something like Fish for instance.
No man is without a past. Someone will come for him or his memory will return until
then I'm sure you'll take good care of him. Cheiron
A belch during a meal is a sign of enjoyment.
There is nothing wrong with making things.
Be careful of machines when you have long hair since it could get bad like a sacrifice
of some hair.
Nothing ruins a meal more than when an ugly scary giant peeks into your window and
scares the Tartarus out of you.
You really think somebody's gonna pay to drink old bean water. Jason
Well it was easy ideas come to me. I look at something and I can see what it could
be. Hephaestus
Some guys just don't want to fight.
It's better to hit with flour instead of flames.
You can't blame anyone when a rock's thrown into your flame thrower after all you
are trying to set people on fire.