Here Comes Trouble!

Warrior Babes The Second

Here Comes Trouble!

Blood Lust

Out to destroy her

She uses a posion dart

To sully a reputation

Kililng oh so eagerly

Sweet pleasure in inflicting pain

Captured and jailed

She makes her escape

Grabs the irritating blonde

A fight to the death

Is what she desires

Lost the fight

Wanting to just die

Down she went but caught

Sent off to jail but not for long

Ends up sinking into quicksand

Finally the death she sought

Doesn't last long due to Hera

Gave her one chance at life

Ate of the Golden Apple

Was granted an eternal life

Escaped her little resort

Able to down some ambrosia

Next locked away in lava

But she was released

Still with the death wish

And wanting her revenge

It didn't make her feel any better

Just wanted it all to end

Finally got her wish

Stabbed with a blade

Dipped in the blood of a hind

One of the things to kill a God

Saved from an eternity in Hell

She became an angel and saved two souls

Gave a new life to a former enemy

Became the renincarnated

In the form of a daughter

Old wounds were healed at last

Destroying Xena

First I must get Xena out of the way easily done with a posioned dart.

Next I ruin her reputation of being a goodie goodie by killing in her name and of course that would include women and children.

Pathetic man telling me to run when it's my men doing the killing including me which I declare a total success.

I just love hearing screams in the morning.

A bloody sword is a sign of success.

Stop

Let her live. You old crone tell the world what we did here. Let them know what devestatioon awaits anyone who defies me. I'm Xena Warrior Princess.

It's so much fun killing innocents and having their warm blood on my hands.

Meet Your Creation

I'm as good as you. And why not you made me.

I just loved reviving Xena's reputation as a wanton killer of women and children which is what she so richly deserves.

I do like that round weapon she has it looks quite deadly.

Good men are so hard to find nowadays.

Practice makes perfect for my inevitable showdown with Xena.

This weapon will look very nice in the skull of the Oracel.

Warrior Queen I like that.

Services?

Your services really and what is it exactly that you do hmm? Oh you're a warrior how silly of me. And why is it dear man that you look like an idiot?

Even An Idiot Can Come In Handy

Every distraction for Xena will help me carry out my plan.

Damn it I hate when my plans get foiled.

I hate it when a horse won't obey my commands.

What Happened

Oh the god Xena. What happened to you one day you just decided to fight for justice? And all the shattered people you left behind were now supposed to cheer you is that it? Oh well that makes all the difference and now we can be the best of friends.

I spit on Xena's apology it's rather pathetic really like that can erase what was done.

Well I'm not afraid to die if that's what you're worried about. What about you Xena how will you feel to see your creation executed without being tried hmm?

Oh no, no, no of course not no it's not her fault at all that I dream every night of my mother's screams coming from my burning home! You teel me Xena do you sleep well at night? Good

I take very little comfort in knowing that Xena doesn't sleep well since she deserves to suffer so much more.

Well I can take whatever it is you think I have coming to me. But you tell me this Xena have you ever been tried for all of the things you have done? Have you ever been handed over to a mob that wanted your blood?

Total Honesty

The sight just the sight of Xena Warrior Princess arguing on my behalf amuses me so. Let me answer your question of what I would do if you let me go. You let me go and I will dedicate my life to killing everything you love. Your friends. Your family. Your reptutation even your horse. You see I am being so honest with you because the idea of your pity is worse than death for me. You see you created a monster with integrity Xena. Scary isn't it? Now take me to the mob.

It's pathetic to see someone reduced to such a state.

Stirring Hate

You're beginning to hate me. You've fought it for some silly sense of guilt. Now I'm a painful reminder of what you used to be and how you may never leave it behind.

Some Respect

You know there used to be some respect mixed up in my hatred for you but not anymore. Your petty scruples are an embarrassment. As a villian you were awesome. As a hero you are a sentimental fool.

I just love a mob screaming fo rmy blood it makes me laugh.

Full Circle

Perfect I'm gonna die just like my family. Kinda full circle don't you think? No, no, no not to fear Xena I won't be screaming out like my sister.

I just love hissing at people and leaving them cowering in fear.

I relish the challenge.

Either way I win.

Yes and what were you hitting her with your nose?

What an incompetent boob this one is with his pointy hat.

Prove Your Worth

There is but another way to prove your worth. Bring her down. Do her. Her the irritating blonde. Slit the throat. Yes. Pierce the skin under the chin with the blade and tear a hole this way.

I want her dead! Do it! Do it!

Just as I thought the man's backbone is mush. Chain him up. We'll have fun killing jellyfish later.

The Best

Now we determine who is the best. You and I in a fight till death. And to make things even more interesting take her up.

Put Out The Rage

In a way I'm disappointed Xena. There was a part of me that hoped you would win and put out the rage in my heart. Sometimes it even scares me. But then I get over it.

Rigth thing to do that's what they think.

I didn't like that chair but I know who I'd love to see strapped in it.

Men can be oh so stupid.

I do after all keep my promies since I made him squeal like a little piggie.

Although I do appreciate the compliment.

I say before I kill you I'm gonna make you squeal like a pig you fat pathetic piece of dung.

Those straps made me itch.

I just love it when they squeal.

I love it when I win and pathetic pieces of dung lose big time.

A New Army

Let them all out. The healthy ones will be the beginning of our new army. Oh and the weak ones put them out of their misery hmm. Theodoris bring that with you I know someone it would look perfect on.

How Very Disappointing

Joxer the last time I saw you you wanted to join my army now you want to fight me. I am so disappointed.

Like I'd ever turn good it is too foreign for thinking.

Take A Message

Tell her this she should have killed me while she had the chance. For every drop of innocent blood I shed from here on out is on her hands as well as mine. Good boy.

The Pesky Heart

Ah don't move pretty that sentimental side of you is a real problem now isn't it? You fight with your heart. That gives me advantage over you. I no longer seem to have one. I'm not gonna kill you now. Oh no first I'm gonna kill your soul just like you killed mine. See you soon my sweet.

Love Unites

Aw love, love, love, love oh it unites you're right and hate divides. Let's see which one is stronger shall we? Good then that makes things simple then doesn't it?

I just love thrusting my sword into people well if I couldn't kill one at least I got the husband and the wails of anguish ringing in the air which is so sweet to my ears.

I long to see you wailing over the body of your friend.

Cries of grief are so soothing to my ears.

No Intoxicants

No I like to experience life in all ilt's agonizing glory. I don't want to dull the sensations in any way.

Love Schmove

You're not falling in love with me are you? I'd have to kill you. Love is a trick that nature plays to get us to reproduce. I want no part of it.

I don't understand you. After all I did you still can't kill me.

No Way Out

How are you gonna get out of this one Xena hmm? Oh but it will be soon. You're about to watch the friendship of your life go up in smoke. Mmm I envy her in a way she gets to leave this life so pure. Wonder if I could have been her? Burn her.

Oh how I do love watching you work.

We're both gonna die Xena. How wonderful. We can spend eternity in Tartarus together hmm.

I have to admit that Xena is good and letting me die would have been the thing I would have done.

Sinking into quicksand while Xena watched wasn't tops on my list of ways I wanted to go out of this world.

Guilt Works Every Time

It's perfect I'll use Xena's guilt to help me escape Tartarus.

So Dreadfully Boring

Hellow Xena oh how I've missed you. Do you know how boring Tartarus can be? Same old torture every day, every day. Makes me appreciate what we had. Oh you're only half right. Dreams are the fine line between the real world and the underworld. And with a little help well that line can just disappear.

The good news is that I'm free while the bad news is I'm stuck in Xena's body.

This should be fun.

I'm sure Xena is having fun in Tartarus in my place.

I get to play with Xena's little friend.

First things first I need to kill all of Xena's precious village along with her mommy of course.

Becoming Xena

Gabrielle I have something important to tell you. You should have killed Callisto. I was wrong. You had every right to not me. For me it was murder and the guilt is going to destroy me. I don't think I can do it again. No Gabrielle. But she's going to try and kill my mother. I can do that but what then? I feel so helpless.

The Enemy

Come on Gabrielle focus on your enemy. It is not new it's just buried. You had that fire when you went up against Callisto the first time remember? That is not what we're talking about. Callisto is already dead. We need to send her back to Tartarus. Now come on this is your weapon and this is your enemy. Now strike. Come one Gabrielle brace with your back foot and lunge with your whole body. All right Gabrielle I'm Callisto right here in front of you. I just look like Xena but really I'm Callisto. So kill me. I said kill me little girl. Come on right here in the chest. Put me out of my misery. You are pathetic! Remember I killed your love. I took my sword and stuck it through him and I felt his warm blood on my hands. And you can't even avenge his death.

That was fun tormenting poor little Gabrielle.

Well hatred's not something to be feared it's a part of all of us. And for some of us it's all we ever really know.

My Satisfaction

First things first Ares. I promised you my allegiance. I promised you an army to rule the world. You promised me satisfaction.

Dumb Animal

You can't figure it can you? I look like Xena. I even smell like Xena. But something tells you I'm not. Poor dumb animal. You don't know what's going on. You don't know whether to run or to stay. Well you should have run.

Talk I really don't feel like talking.

Well he asked to be killed so the least I could do is kill him and the look on his face was priceless.

My Little Friend Now

Gabrielle, Gabrielle oh well I'm Xena now so she's my little friend. Of course if anything ever happened to Gabrielel pretty Xena would be crushed would I? Maybe something has already happened to Gabrielle. Maybe I've already killed her and hung her up from that tree.

Oooh I like that move.

Even my greatest enemy can come up with a move that's really good.

Winning

Go on you can take her out with the dagger or you can let her kill you. Looks like someone's gonna die and either way I win.

How in Tartarus would I know what the brat was dreaming or not dreaming about it's not like I even like her I just wanted to have some fun with her and torturing her a bit and having her kill Xena would have been so much fun.

Getting Satisfaction

In a short time Xena will be back in the underworld and I won't have my satisfaction. You forbid me! No one God or man forbids me from doing anything. All my anger, all my hatred is for Xena alone. When I'm done with her you can have what's left. I won't care.

I hate it when men run away instead of standing their ground as I ordered them to the sniveling cowards.

No Guilt For Me

It makes no difference I can still wake up from this nightmare and I will have no guilt to make my dreams restless.

However evil you think I am my soul is clean because it is all on you. You started this when you killed my family.

It's so not fair that I got sent back to Tartarus and Xena is still running around alive.

Why do they want to blame me when it's all her fault.

Punch Anyone

Let the fun begin with a little something in their punch and then the real festivities begin.

My, my looks like somebody spiked the punch glad I don't drink.

By sunset your friends will be driven mad well that's if they d on't kill each other first.

Insane?

Just misunderstood.

Oh now, now Hercules just because I poisioned your friends doesn't mean we can't be nice to one another.

Bullseye

Oh but think about it I mean well if your children weren't your children then they'd still be alive now wouldn't they? Your love it's a curse.

Cursed

Tell me Hercules late at night in the dark all alone do you uh do you hear your children screaming? Do you lie awake at night wondering if there was something else you could have done maybe if you had gotten there a little sooner, been a little bit more respectful to Hera. Oh but I do understand. My family was slaughtered like helpless animals as well. I learned to get exactly what I want when I want it? And you realize Hercules theo nly reason your friends are still alive is because I have allowed it. Oh no you owe me all.

Not So Different

We're not as different as you'd like to think. We both believe the wicked should be punished. Only I see something you don't. All people are wicked and they deserve everything they're gonna get.

Good?

If mortals were good well then we wouldn't need you around would we.

Xena I believe she deserves to die a very slow and painful death.

Peace

Peace? Peace? I dreamed of peace. I imagined it. Let me die so I can find it. Tartarus should have been a welcome change. Instead I learned the true meaning of torture trapped in my hatred with nothing to do.

Making Plans

I think the first thi ng I'm gonna do is find the good Xena and rip out her tongue just to hear her with an apology.

That's the spirit kill me I dare you.

Blow Out The Candles

You're gonna die on your birthday how convenient.

Why can't you just die like a good boy?

Furry Little Friend

No, no, no, no,no relax my furry little friend no you're not dinner. That's the boring part about immortality. You're never hungry. No you're definetely not food. You're my little Hercules. Hercules trapped me in this little resort. I owe him a lot and I'm planning on paying him back for his kindness soon.

Unexpected Guest

Oh Xena so glad you could stop by for a visit and here I was afraid I'd never get to torture you again. As you can see I've been keeping busy scarred by fire entombed for eternity you'll uh you'll forgive me if I'm not exactly at my peak hmm.

Oh how I've missed Xena and our little chats.

Such a pretty day for a bloodbath.

Can't Be Killed

That was good but you know the problem don't you? I'm immortal. You can't kill me. You can't even hurt me. Oh but you want to don't you?

Immortals don't bleed and we heal fast oh but not in pieces.

That was kinda fun running myself through with the sword it tickled a little bit in fact.

This will be fun making Xena confess all her sins after all she created me.

Ambrosia

And then it's you and me and the ambrosia. I just had a marvelous idea why don't you and I both eat it that way we can be fighting each other for eternity?

Who needs friends when enemies are so much fun.

She's right it's funny but I do think I have a death wish.

So Annoying

I was only asking for Xena and would have gladly given her Gabrielle but no she wouldn't listen to reason she must have rocks for brains.

You don't just kill me and walk away.

Hope she has fun digging herself out of those rocks.

Patience is a virtue.

Truth Or Dare

All right we both know how much I love chit chat. My goodness are you trying to figure me out? I'm flattered. Let's play a game shall we? I'll answer your question if you answer mine. What did I feel when Xena confessed her crimes? Well the problem is Gabrielle I never feel anything. I mean bits and pieces here and there but nothing solid. Think back to when you were a little girl and all you knew was your mother and your sister and all of your faith revolved around them. Now kill them. My turn. When I sliced open your husband how long did it take for him to die?

Bait

Now are we to stake Gabrielle out as the sacrificial lamb she is or are we to trust that she won't be running?

Immortality

Speak for yourself staying alive isn't something that concerns my anymore.

If I liked people I might almost like this Valasca.

Dumping her into the lava pit should be fun.

Wish me luck not that you would. Oh Xena next time we meet I'll be a God.

A fire here and there should really brighten things up.

Exquisite Pain

And that's exactly how she'll feel when Solan dies stabbed, stabbed through the heart. Pierced to the soul with such exquisite pain. Oh I wish I could have seen it.

Oh to see her suffer is all I live for to see utter pain. I'll just relish every moment.

Solan isn't is? Flesh of your flesh. Bone of your bone. Can't wait to see all that.

My Cookout

You'll do what make my life a living hell old hat dear. You did that years ago when you barbecued my family but now it's my turn to host the cookout.

It Hurts

Hurts doesn't it losing your family? Rips out your heart and your guts, your feelings. All that's left is the pain right? Welcome to the club.

Like to kill me? Wish you could.

Left Empty

You've won. All these years I've spent living to destroy you thinking that only if I could give you the same pain that you gave me I'd be rid of it. Life would go on. And then I do and nothing changes. I don't feel better just empty. So you let me go Xena can't win this battle and you've already won the war.

Disturbed Me!

Oh yeah and uh what exactly are you gonna do if I don't huh? You gonna kill me? 'Cause I'm a Goddess now sweet cheeks and Goddesses don't die.

My Life

My life will never end and it was over years ago in Cirra.

Fire

Yeah well love fire it's been a part of me since Xena's army burned my home and that fired turned my family to ashes and everybody died that day.

I'll show you carnage like you've never dreamed of a landscape littered with body parts.

No Club

But I wouldn't want to be in a club that would have me for a member.

So this stuff really works how delicious.

I just loved the look Strife got in his eyes when he realized that he was gonna die.

Why are you people so afraid to die?

I love a good chase.

You have to die for both of us now.

Little Callisto's Vow

I will never cry.

There's a price to pay for being a hero? Are you willing to pay it?

8

It's Auntie Callisto

Hi honey I'm home. Well there you are. Hello pumpkin. Your Auntie Callisto's brought you a little treat. It is what you wanted isn't is they called him the the Priest of the Flesh. Now shall I carve or will you?

We Meet Again

Not happy to see me are you? Neither am I really. Well I've got a plan to solve both our problems. Oh Xena. I tell you about it and the first thing you know you'll be trying to stop me. You just trust me you're gonna love it. Well least half of it.

My Sword

It's funny how I keep this thign around I don't really need. It's just for decoration and for fun. I don't know if I'm toying with your or you're toying with me.

Well if I couldn't get Xena Ares will certainly.

Loved to chat but gotta go.

Not Just Death

More than that I want oblivion. I want my life to end. I want it all to stop. No nothing. No memories. No Tartarus. Nothing.

Cut Off Hand

Nice try but that threat worked when I was only a mortal. But I'm a God now Xena. Welcome to my world now get ready to leave it.

I just love the irony of Gabrielle and her daughter looking exactly the same.

Oh mother and child reunion I'm all misty eyed.

Hope

Now she's scary and you just lost your one chance before she hatched Xena.

So be if it she wants to look like the brat.

Well it is a good disguise. It'll attract less attention than walking around naked I suppose.

I've always wanted to blow off Ares head.

Digging In The Dagger

You remember when I killed Strife that look in his eyes? You're next Ares.

The Deal

I'll help you put Dahak back in the bottle and you help me die. I figure you have a bead on that hinds blood dagger. Hercules probably told you where it was. It can kill a God you know. So how about it I scratch your back you stab mine?

Bored With Life

I yearn for oblivion, annihilation peace if you will.

Please who said anything about suffering really it's more of a boredom thing an emptiness really.

It's fun to set things on fire and the flames are oh so pretty.

A girl's gotta have some fun.

Try not to die before doing me first or I'll make Gabrielle wish you had? How's that for incentive?

Do it gut her then it's my turn.

Bad News

You mean to tell me that those stupid maudlin missions she goes on are gonna end her up in paradise!

Oh right she cooks my family, destroys my life and I end up in Hell while she gets another shot that's fair.

I could get to like this Caesar guy after all we have so much in common and I could get a Get Out of Hell ticket if this plan works.

No Physical Harm

I'm not crazy about not being able to shed even a littlle blood but hey if it gets Xena where she belongs in Hell it'll all be worth it.

Damaged Beyond Repair

Don't bother you've already done all the damage you can to me thanks by the way. I wanted to cease existing and you did your best to help. But as you can see it didn't take they wouldn't let me off the hook that easy. I don't know whoever it is who does the final judging. They sent me to a place that makes Tartarus look like the Elysian Fields they call it Hell.

And so now you're not the only clever girl are you Xena?

I just keep coming back in that way I'm more dependable than your chakram.

The Offer

That's because you haven't heard it all yet. I'm offering you complete serenity. There's a reason you can't allow you and your partner peace it's your guilt. It motivates everything you do. It torments you. Invite me into your soul. I can rid you of that guilt. I can cleanse you of that shame that drives you. I can give you peace if you let me. What's it gonna be Xena serenity and happiness or another ride in that wagon with your friend Gabrielle? Think of your vision.

Damn well it'll be fun to see them executed but I'll give her another chance to save her precious Gabrielle.

A Final Offer

All right let's keep it simple I keep the vision from coming true and you leave Caesar alone.

Rejection

I offer her peace and serenity and she rejects it. I just don't understand I'd kill for that offer but no I'm stuck in Hell if things don't go the way my Lord wants.

Hmm

So stubborn that I just couldn't stand watching it so I used the chakram and it was quite an interesting turn of events when Xena was all helpless Gabrielle turned into quite an impressive killing machine. I didn't think she had it in her but she sure sliced through those soldiers like they were butter but unfotunately she stopped it was kinda fun to see her like that.

I'm kinda disappointed that I didn't get that treatment when she wanted to kill me after I killed her precious husband oh well back to the drawing board.

Don't give me that confident look you're about to die like a slave and drag your friend with you and it's all right by me.

So close yet so far and I'm delivering Xena to my Lord and Gabrielle well she'll just be a bonus.

Damn that angel and his buddies taking my prize from me oh well at least I've got Gabrielle to play with.

Knowing Xena as I do I know she'll come for her giving me another opportunity.

Welcome To Hell

Morning honey. Aren't you the lucky girl? You get to spend eternity with me. Let me confess something I'm gonna enjoy tormenting you. I'm sure the Powers That Be will try to rob me of my joy. It's all with a catch down here. You have such faith how cute. Course they'll try to rescue you and Xena will make some selfless self sacrificing getsure. But fear not we'll be ready for them. Eat up my little dumpling you must be famished. Dying makes one so very hungry.

This is so much fun seeing little Gabrielle get in touch with the demon side of things.

Undying Hatred

I will never stop hating you Xena do you hear me? Never! You killed my family, my soul, my reason to live and love and I will spend eternity seeking revenge.

Angelic

I'm not a very good fighter but if it makes you feel better. I don't blame you. I did a terrible thing. I killed someone you loved. I must have been very evil. I don't understand it myself. Why would Xena do something like that for me? My family? My family. You know Michael told me that I would never know love like the love of heaven but he's wrong. My family gave me that kind of love all the time. My memory of so much of my life is confused and fuzzy but that part I remember every detail. And Michael says when I'm ready I get to see them again. I'm so sorry.